What Swan Knew


MP Norman Fry 2




I have a statement I would like to read
On Monday night, following a long meeting with the Chancellor,
I needed to go to the toilet, so I went to one I knew would be open at three in the morning. On Hampstead Heath.
Upon my arrival, I met two men, Carlos and Eduardo, who invited me into their cubicle to talk to them about government policy.
Unfortunately, I slipped on the wet floor and became sandwiched between the two men.
In a position that the arresting officer informed me is known as a spit roast.
As far as I am concerned, that is the end of the matter.
Oh, and by the way, Carlos, if you’ve had the X-ray and found my watch, please do return it to me. It belonged to my late father. Thank you.